【Never Give Up Column】"Getting cancer" - I believe no one wishes to encounter these three words in their lives, whether for themselves or for those around them. It would be best if they never had to face it throughout their lives, as both patients and caregivers will encounter various problems and challenges throughout the treatment journey. Patients will experience fear, anxiety, and uneasiness. Fortunately, "love" will emerge unnoticed, with devoted caregivers by their side, making patients feel like they haven't lost anything, but rather gained more.

When I learned that the subject of this Never Give Up interview was a hiking enthusiast and a stage three breast cancer warrior, I felt a little apprehensive. She was eager to share every detail of her battle against cancer and her journey in sports, truly helping fellow travelers who have stumbled on their path by giving them some positive energy. When we first met, I saw a beautifully dressed lady sitting at the bar in a Japanese restaurant, with a glass of red wine on the table.

 

"Hello! I'm Vivian!"

Vivian was diagnosed with stage three breast cancer in November 2022. She had gynecological check-ups every six months and breast exams once a year. One day, she inadvertently discovered a lump in her breast, exactly three months after her last check-up. "While watching TV, I accidentally felt a lump in my breast. As I felt it, it felt hard and a bit painful, and then I knew something was wrong. My hair stood on end, I felt like it was 'that thing' (cancer cells)!"

"As I felt my breast, it was hard. I felt like it was 'that thing' (cancer cells)."

No time to lose. Every second counts.

Vivian didn't hesitate for a moment, nor did she waste a single second. She knew she had to deal with it immediately and decisively, with no time to process her emotions. "I didn't think much; I knew I had to deal with it right away! Immediately! In fact, if it hadn't been nighttime, I would have gone to see a doctor that very night." "I called to make an appointment, and luckily I was able to get an urgent slot, because usually you need to book in advance. I told the nurse that I was really urgent, that I had found a lump, and the nurse let me jump the queue. "The next day, after work, I immediately went for a check-up, saw my gynecologist, had a mammogram, a biopsy, and a needle aspiration. The gynecologist then referred me to a lab for tests, and after the analysis, it was discovered that it was already stage 3 breast cancer."

 

"I had no time to think, I had to deal with it immediately! By the time it was discovered, it was already stage 3 (breast cancer)."

Important Decisions

I believe any patient diagnosed with the bad news of cancer must feel devastated! It was only a short 15 days from discovering the breast tumor to having surgery. Vivian was not surprised after receiving the diagnosis report; instead, she decisively made treatment decisions, which is absolutely not easy. "I accepted it. I just knew I had to get treated as soon as possible. I consulted different breast specialists, and they all let me choose for myself. All four doctors were very renowned."

 

"I already had an answer in my heart, I decided to remove the entire breast!"

"Luckily, my tumor wasn't near the nipple; it was only on the side of the breast. I could have had a quarter (excision), or a complete mastectomy. Actually, after seeing four doctors, I already had an answer in my heart, but it seemed like a plot device to think about it. So I went back and forth, but in reality, I already knew I couldn't keep it, so I decided to remove the entire breast!" When Vivian shared this, I couldn't help but ask her where her decisiveness and courage came from. She said:

"Because I love the people around me, everyone around me cares about me so much and loves me dearly. I don't want them to worry. I want to live; I can't let anything happen to me!"

Loves Hiking. Enjoys Hiking.

Vivian is a hiking enthusiast, and one of the motivations that kept her from collapsing and pushed her to persevere was hiking. "I love exercising, I love hiking. I thought to myself: if something happens to me, how will I hike? I still have many mountains to hike. I have a list of Hong Kong's top ten hiking trails at home, and I've actually hiked very few of them. I still need to keep hiking."

"If something happens to me, how will I hike? I still have many mountains to hike!"

Vivian believes that health is very important and regularly hikes. She has tried both easy and difficult trails, such as reservoirs in different places, Thousand Island Lake, and has even challenged Kau Keng Shan, Needle Hill, and Castle Peak night hikes, etc. "The most memorable mountains I've hiked are Kau Keng Shan and High Junk Peak. I got lost on Kau Keng Shan; it was very difficult to hike, using both hands and feet. I'd rate it four or five stars. Hiking ordinary reservoirs doesn't really satisfy me; I like to challenge myself. I grew up in a greenhouse, but I don't know why I become more competitive as I get older."

 

"I enjoy the tough process; I especially love hiking challenging mountains!"

Vivian works as a clinic nurse, where she encounters different types of patients every day, further emphasizing the importance of exercise and health. "Besides hiking, I also do yoga. Perhaps because of my profession, I see many elderly people, and there's a huge difference in physical condition between those who exercise and those who don't! I go hiking every Saturday, at least one day a week. Because I was undergoing treatment and my body needed time to recover, I would hike along Castle Peak Road, Shing Mun Reservoir, Dragon's Back, and routes like Siu Sai Wan, Chai Wan, and Tung Chung. I understand that rest is for walking longer and steeper paths tomorrow."

 

"I want to be healthy, so I need to keep exercising!"

"I went hiking before my first chemotherapy session, and also before the second one, hiking to Thousand Island Lake and the Yuen Tsuen Ancient Trail, among others. Hiking during chemotherapy is really tough, but I was very happy; my mood affects my condition. It was hard because I would be out of breath and also worried about infections, and I had to wear a mask, because an infection would be a huge deal. But I knew my immunity was okay; I had confidence in myself!"

 

"Mood affects one's condition. I have confidence in myself!"

Post-Surgery Side Effects

Vivian needs to take anti-cancer hormone medication for five years, and the medication has caused quite a few side effects on her body and emotions. "I've already had my lymph nodes removed, and I can't exert force. If I make big movements or get hot, my arm swells, and I have to massage it gently every day. But sometimes people get lazy, and if I don't massage it, it gets numb." "I also experience bone pain and irritability, and my emotions are affected, but I control my emotions because I know it's due to the medication, and I remind myself not to get irritated!"

 

"My breast reconstruction involved moving rectus abdominis muscle to my breast, and now when I do abdominal movements, it feels numb and I can't exert force!"

Before getting sick, Vivian already loved yoga and hiking. Regular exercise made her recovery journey much smoother. "The doctor said it would take two to three years before I could do the action of getting up directly from a lying position, but after my surgery and chemotherapy, I could already do this action. In fact, I can even do sit-ups, but I didn't push myself to do them specifically." "I know exercise is very important! I have to stretch often, because if I don't stretch my arms for two days, they immediately can't straighten! I have a scar in my armpit, and if I don't stretch, the wound pulls, and my chest feels numb all the time."

 

"After the surgery, I have a 42 cm long scar on my belly. When hiking, using my leg muscles causes a pulling pain, which also reminds me not to give up on life!"

 

Dealing with Frizzy Hair - Hair Loss

Many patients feel uneasy about experiencing significant hair loss after chemotherapy. Vivian simply took preemptive action and shaved her head before starting chemotherapy to avoid the panic of massive hair loss. "I didn't let it fall out; I didn't give it a chance to fall out! I didn't want to pick up clumps of hair and cry like in a drama, so I shaved it all off! I didn't want to face myself pulling out a clump of hair and then asking myself if I should cry. I'm very vain, I just knew I had to shave it quickly; I didn't want to face bald patches; I didn't need to experience that kind of drama."

 

"I didn't want to be like those characters in dramas, picking up clumps of hair and crying, so I shaved it all off!"

Brave Vivian dressed herself as usual during chemotherapy, embracing and enjoying her unique experience. "Not everyone gets this opportunity (to be bald), so if you have it, you should enjoy it. I had to go through it, so it's better to embrace it than resist it. I wore headscarves and wigs. I even bought razors to shave it perfectly smooth, so there wouldn't be any patches. I didn't need to experience that kind of drama."

 

The biggest changes before and after falling ill

Vivian described herself as always being very competitive and headstrong, but after getting sick, her whole personality changed. She became more positive, more humble, and more understanding of love. "I used to be quite wild, but after being sick, I'm a completely different person. I cherish my friends more, I'm less arrogant, much more humble, and I understand love. I used to not hug my father, no one in my family would hug, but ever since I got sick, I hug them, I embrace them. I think it's nothing, it's just love."

 

"Ever since I got sick, I hug them, and everyone shows their affection. I think it's nothing, it's just love."

 

"I'm also a very strong person. In the past, my dad and I would argue after just a few words, but he loves me very much. Ever since I got sick, everyone has shown their true feelings. The last time I went to Japan with him, he hugged me, and I hugged him. He only said two words, 'Good girl,' nothing else. I hugged him tightly, something I'd never done with my dad in decades. So I gained more than I lost; I didn't actually lose anything!"

 

"All I lost was something broken. I gained more than I lost. Without going through it, you wouldn't realize how precious everything around you is!"

 

Special thanks to those who helped

"I'm grateful to Meina (my friend) and my boyfriend. My boyfriend didn't say much, just silently supported me. He said as long as I'm okay and happy, I can do whatever I want. After my surgery, I couldn't take care of myself, like a useless person. One time I cried hysterically, and my boyfriend hugged me and let me cry. He said I needed to cry. That's how he silently supported me." Vivian and her boyfriend have been together for over a decade. During her treatment, her boyfriend and friends silently supported and cared for her, giving her positive energy.

The Law of Attraction — whether positive or negative frequencies, the Law of Attraction will bring you more of the same. Vivian strongly agrees. "During this period, I was very happy, very positive, and very optimistic. Everything I encountered was very positive; even strangers were very kind to me. I feel very lucky!"

 

What does "Never Give Up" mean?

Vivian has a tattoo on her arm that reads "Never Give Up" and a four-leaf clover. "I designed it myself. The last part is a four-leaf clover, representing luck. I once lost a dog, and I was depressed for a few years, unable to let go. I got him (the dog) tattooed on me, but I still hadn't found peace. Then I decided to get a golden phrase tattooed to remind myself not to give up on myself, so I got 'Never Give Up' tattooed. Never give up on anything."

 

"Don't give up on life, on your dreams, on what you want to do! Why give up?"

Life influences life. Throughout the interview, I was moved by Vivian's experience. I remember one of her sayings: "Love needs to be felt, not just spoken; it needs to be experienced!" One of the goals of Never Give Up is to inspire you through individual stories and to collectively appreciate the unique experiences of every person who loves sports. Vivian, you are beautiful, strong, and amazing! Keep going!

 

By Ho.W.K.

NGU